Miss Me With That Dropping Knowledge Shit

Can it be, it was all so simple then?
I remember back in the day when it was just some old dude, maybe an old lady on the train reading a prayer or a few bible verses at the top of their lungs during the A.M. rush hour. Once in a blue moon a Jehovah’s Witness might catch me slipping and slide me a copy of that Watch Tower followed by a 5 to 10 minute sermon. I didn’t even mind the Nation of Islam brothers rolling up on me with the Final Call and the bean pies because if you didn’t bite on it, they didn’t linger. Shit, this one time, I’m almost sure that when I told the bow-tied brother I was good, he told me in return “Ok then, peace my nigga.” But I used to smoke a lot back then so I can’t be sure. Compared to now, I really miss those days.

In your face knowledge, so heed to these words.
Now days, we got niggas dressed up like Raiden from Mortal Kombat, standing on milk crates with megaphones screaming their message at random, busy intersections for anybody within earshot. They have literature, incense, body oils and a lot of pinned up aggression towards anybody seeming like they aren’t open to accept the knowledge they are bestowing upon them. Funny thing about this is that all those niggas sound like the long lost members of the Wu Tang clan not featured on “36 Chambers.” On the bright side, cutting a wide circle around dudes will allow you to bypass that whole ordeal. I wish it was that easy in all instances.

Instead of taking one of those online Phoenix University classes…
Whether they’ve been to jail, got a hold of one of those “Illuminati is everybody and everybody is Illuminati” DVDs, spent too much time alone reading the bible or connected all the dots on the internet so they now see “the bigger picture” that so many others failed to. (Yeah, that might be one of the longest sentences I’ve ever written; sue me.) This person clearly has a wealth of free time on their hands by way of unemployment, incarceration or just mind-numbing boredom. But, worry not. They took advantage of that down time overlooking the bachelor’s degree in ‘Advanced Frisbee Throwing’ and went straight to learning about all the dark forces running the world.

Random dude sitting next to me is a conspiracy theorist.
I guess this ‘locs and glasses’ combo makes me look open to the teachings of strangers because they love to drop knowledge on me. Just be it my fucking luck, with all that knowledge he’s accrued, he has chosen to randomly share it with me. So here I am window seating it up on the train, deep into the latest trending topic on Twitter (#WhyYourBabyMammaCantDoHandStands) and, unbeknownst to me, this self educated scholar plops down right beside me. First stop; no words but a few empty seats open up and he doesn’t make a break for any of them. Second stop; he introduces himself followed by an abundance of information about not a muthafucking thing that I can possibly use. Fifth stop; he’s half way into the real creation of the earth and I’m wondering if I could snap his neck in one smooth motion. Although I want him to say some shit that will just blow my mind, it never happens. I really want to say “Get the fuck away from me with that dumb shit.” I just end up spending the rest of the train ride listening to why the world is so messed up and I don’t know what’s really going on.

Saying “Miss me with that dumb shit,” would really save me a lot of strife.
Jean DeGrate should have spoken