Yesterday I was out with my daughter to get her a fall jacket and winter coat. I'm not one of those parents that waits for Jack Frost to start tapping on my windowpane while I'm trying to push my seed outside in a jean jacket and scarf. Nah B, Mother Nature won't catch me slipping. So this time, just like any other time, I'm out in public with my Madi women are all in my face which brings me to reason number 1...
Women love single fathers
"Aww look at her taking little man to get his hair cut. She's such a great mom. I should try to get at her." - No man EVER. Seeing a woman toting around a kid is about as sexually appealing as Discovery Channels 'Shark Week' (and if you find Shark Week sexy you may need to check on your mental health). That little boy you're walking with is luggage to most men looking on. When I'm walking thru the mall with my daughter ever 3rd woman is literally going to stop and say "Hey cutie" to Madison while giving me the once over. That soft pitch box action is just waiting for me to say hello. The girl from Last Stop gave me two receipts one for my purchase and the other with her number on it. She likes me because I bought my daughter a jacket, yeah me.
2. Dead beat dads still be winning
I know dead beat dads with live in girlfriends that have never seen their kids. How is that possible? These silly ass women are given these lames the benefit of the doubt, then turn around and be in their feelings when she gets knocked up and he gets low on her. How is it possible to be with a man and you haven't even seen a picture of Lil Ray Ray on his FaceBook page? I don't know but, these niggas be acting up and ya'll hoes be letting them.
3. Dead beat mothers reap no such benefits
If a woman isn't taking care of her kids she's the scum of the earth. You don't have to worry about her getting pregnant once a dude comes past the house and sees that day old dried up snot of Junior's face. He might hit it still but trust he won't be laying in that raw under any circumstances. "You got your tubes tied and you had your ovaries removed and you got tested for every STD known to man just this morning? I still rather not take any chances, you know anything can happen and you can't be too safe. So where is the nearest 7-11 at again?"
4. Part time daddy
I don't know any fulltime dads that aren't in a relationship with the mother of the child. I know they exist; they just don't exist in abundance. So if you're a single dad out here you almost definitely have some non-kid occupied free time. Almost every single mother I know is on the job 90% of the time. They're out here bribing other single mother homies to watch the kids so she can get a date night in and shit. "If you watch Kennedy and James Jr. tonight I promise I'll take Markell all weekend and even take him to Chuck E Cheese."
5. We get undue credit for doing the right thing
Walking thru the grocery store people stop and thank me for being a father to my child. People who have never even seen me interact with my Madison naturally assume I'm a great dad. How did they come to this conclusion? Fuck if I know, but I bask in the praise all the same.
Single dads be winning
Jean DeGrate has spoken