It's a 100 dope reason to stick a chick in the friend beside the oh so obvious reason being that she is ugly as sin. Here's my other top 5 reasons why I put these bitches in the friend zone (and I mean bitches in the nicest possible way).
She has ugly kid(s)
Now that I am out of the baby making game this isn't as big as deal breaker as it once was because I surely won't be mixing my DNA with anybody. Nevertheless, as soon as I see those sea monkey looking fuck trophies posted all over her FaceBook account I know we will never have a future. You ever dated a bitch with ugly kids? She'll speak of these children like they are really going to have good looking people woes. "I know I only got a couple years before little boys start calling the house looking for Janae." But in all reality unless Janae is on her way to being a first class whore that home phone will remain clear of young gentlemen suitors. I don't have time to keep hearing about no ugly ass kids and nodding my head like any of this shit will come in to existence. Friend zone, but no kid talks ever.
She is an extra value meal away from being obese
I unfuck women all the time, but its all types of stipulations with it and none more important than the 2 year zero sex rule. If I fuck a girl now that's on the very brink of falling off I have to walk around with her name on my penis resumé for the next 730 days. I refuse to let our thing elevate any further when I know I will be forced to have her existence expunged later on. Friend zone, but I will give her countless free fitness tips and even workout with her a time or two.
I met her when I was drunk
When I'm drunk I get r... let's just say I have less than gentleman like behavior when I've consume one too many alcoholic beverages. It's still amazing to me how I've managed not to get smacked in the club, but that's neither here nor there. The way I carry on in the club is totally unacceptable (not that I plan on changing) and any woman accepting of that conduct is either crazy or a hoe or a crazy ass hoe. She might not be any of things but I'm comfortable stereotyping her. Friend zone, but I still might smash and slang that BFF title at her. I'm not above it.
She consistently compliments herself
She thinks she's cute; hey what a coincidence I think that too (or at the very least she has a body that just won't quit). What I don't need is for her to constantly remind of her beauty. That shit is annoying. I get enough of women boosting themselves up and patting themselves on their back on social media. The last thing I need is fully dressed pictures coming to my phone showing me all the "likes" she got on IG as a attempt to remind how lucky I am to be dating her. Friend zone; save that shit for a dude who has never dated a chick worth being seen with.
I'm not rich by any stretch of the imagination but poor women are depressing. I once attempted to date one that considered TGI Friday's as fancy dinning; needless to say the date never came to be. Their lives are filled with so much struggle and it's in their everyday conversation. She treated herself to Subway for 2 days this week so it's PB&J for the rest of the week, only paying bills that come in brightly colored envelopes and a large assortment of other financial woes. Friend zone, but I have some dope penny stock to tell you about that might pay out in the long run.
Because I friend zone women everyday B
Jean DeGrate has spoke
PS No New Friends coming next week with helpful tips on how to stay out of the friend zone
PSS follow me on Twitter @ JeanDeGrate