Tuesday, February 11, 2014

At 25 You Should...

When I was approaching 25 I didn't have a jazzy checklist of shit to have accomplished by the time I hit the mid point of my 20's. I just wanted to drive a luxury whip and have a real job with dependable income (oh yeah and stay out of jail in my era they were dropping that "dead or in jail line" real heavy). Mission Accomplished. In retrospect it should have been a few more things on the list but this blog isn't about me it's about you young people so on with the list...

As a young lady at 25 you should no longer be dating an aspiring rapper
Bae spits that hot fire. He's killing the open mic scene. All his YouTube videos got at least 3000 views. He's got 6000+ twitter and Instagram followers but he's a cashier at Big Lots and he is still sleeping in the same room he was sleeping in when he was a 7th grader. You got to jump ship boo because he's dreams of being a rap star probably won't ever materialize into a down payment on that single family home in the suburbs let alone gold and platinum records.

At 25 you should be done taking coon pictures
You and your crew in the club photo booth throwing up the middle finger, you guys are real trendsetters. Who exactly are you flipping the bird too? The camera man? Anybody looking at the picture? Cut that monkey shit out. Keep your wads of money in your pocket. Don't poke your ass at towards the camera. Keep your guns on other illegal paraphernalia off Instagram, FB and Twitter (the feds are really watching no 2Chainz).

At 25 you should be done collecting empty liquor bottles
Who are you impressing with those 17 empty bottles of Red Berry Ciroc sitting on your kitchen counter? You could be do something so much more productive with that space besides trying to prove that you've consumed a lot of rapper approved vodka. "Girl I went to see Dre last night and he had endless empty Patron bottles on top of his fridge. I know he be getting it in, I'mma give him some pussy." - No Grown Woman EVER

At 25 (barring you're not a full time student) you should have a real fucking job
I'm sure the discount at DTLR is love and you don't have to wait in line for Jordans anymore. All that is dope, but if any of your co-workers have can't take phone calls after 11p and have bedtimes you're not working a real job. Your real job should offer things like medical, 401k and a starting hourly pay at least 3 dollars above whatever hourly minimum wage is.

At 25 you should be done living beyond your means
Saying things like "I only got 50 to hold me over to payday" is not an indication that you're poor but it's definitely says you're not managing your money well. The living check to check and stockpiling credit card debt days should behind you barring any unseen financial crisis. Know your wage and act accordingly.

Because at 25 you should just know better
Jean DeGrate has spoken