*I love posting pictures to help bring the messages of my blogs to life, and in this particular instance, I'd love to post a collage of ugly bitches. Particularly those that I know personally, who clog my timeline with selfies day in and day out. We all know a few of these bitches, the ones with like 4 combined likes on their Instagram "selfies". But, airing them out might just be the line I'm not willing to cross. Isn't that crazy? After all the fucked up shit I've put into print, came back to edit and proofread, then still decide to post on the web for the whole wide world to read, I still have boundaries and shit. I still have a teeny tiny corner of tact left in me. Look at God. Ok, enough of that; now on with the blog...* (Sidenote: If you're curious about whether I'm talking about you, send me a DM, and I'll gladly let you know.)
First of all, when I say "ugly" I mean "all-around unattractive". I know as soon as you get like 4 lines into this blog, 75% of you are going to think, "Well, what if she has a phat ass?" or some silly shit along that line. NO! I'm talking about flat-out, all-around busted bitches. Her face is ugly. Her body is ugly. Her soul might be beautiful. Her mind might be beautiful. Yet and still, nobody wants to FaceTime this hoe. If she has kids, every single one of them was an accident or a blatant setup. Nobody intentionally gets these types of women pregnant. NOBODY! There will be no "it gets better" ad campaign for these bitches; this type of ugly doesn't fade with time.
I'm sick of you bitches. Not because you're ugly; that's the hand that poor genetics and Jesus dealt you. There's nothing you can do about that. It's your failure to accept your ugliness that blows my life. We all have flaws. I personally have ugly feet and a horrible speaking voice. Your flaws just cover the entirety of your physical form. Let us not pretend they don't exist. Don't punish the world with your ugly face posted up all over the net. Don't call people bullies when they come at your neck for being gruesome. You did this to yourself by drawing attention to yoursefl. Go be one of those face-covered Muslim chicks; Allah and them are still taking applications. Nope, you're still Christians, walking around showing your face off to the world and snapping a pic in every bathroom mirror you pass. You hoes don't want to be humble for real though.
See that's the problem with you new wave ugly bitches is that you knew you were ugly as a child, you just refused to believe it. You were the girls that got picked on daily... the girls little boys didn't want to give candy to when they were handing out those Valentine's Day lollipops and shit. It's wasn't a thought in even one of you unpleasant looking hoe's minds that you were anything more than ugly. Then you grew up, started making money, buying your own clothes, tossing weave on your heads, applying makeup with butter knives, and thought you defeated the ugly. Nah boo; you're still ugly, and very much so. If you put Gucci, Louie, a Remy weave, and MAC on a donkey, it's still going to be a fucking donkey (a fly ass donkey, but a donkey nonetheless). If you put syrup on a pile of shit, that doesn't make it pancakes. You can't undo your ugly; know your fucking lane.
In my eyes, being an ugly woman is just like being a man. You've got to work for everything in life. Better yet, let's just call ugly women, "the new men". Find yourself a trade. Be a mechanic. Niggas love bitches who can change a tire and fix a transmission. Learn some jokes and get your funny up. The only way to soften the blow of your face is if something humorous is coming out of it. Buy men drinks in the club, and pay for all your first dates; it shows your independence and helps balance out your appearance. Only post pictures of yourself doing epic shit. You know when you're crossing the finish line at the Boston Marathon, post that. Or when you're rescuing babies from burning buildings, post that shit. Feeding the homeless on Thanksgiving, post that shit. Removing flies from the eyeballs of starving African kids, post that shit. Sucking a dick while doing a handstand, yeah... post that shit there. A selfie of you sitting in your cubicle captioned "bored waiting on 5 o'clock", don't post that shit.
Don't let your ugly be your crutch; let it be your motivation.
Jean DeGrate has spoken