My Top 5 Reasons Why Obama will be reelected

This just in: Mitt Romney won Nevada. What does that mean to any democrat hoping that Obama stays in office? Not a motherfucking thing. If Newt Gingrich and Sarah Palin had a love child that grew into a beautiful woman and that woman married Romney forming the perfect Tea Party/Republican Party family, Obama would still get reelected. And this is why...
 
1. Black people love Obama and everything about Obama
(And by “black people”, I mean “coons”) These coons claim Obama like they personally went to Chicago and talked him into running for president. Four months ago, it was Obama's 19th anniversary, and you would have thought they actually knew Barack and Michelle the way these coons were raving about it. Pictures are posted on FaceBook and Twitter everyday of Michelle Obama. The only person to fuck a president and get this much exposure was Marilyn Monroe. (Jackie O fell a distance 3rd.)
 
2. The Republicans hate the gays
They do. Part of being a Republican means that you must please conservatives by blocking the civil liberties of the gays.
 
3. Occupy Wall Street... DC... Oakland... etc...
If for a millisecond you thought these people squatting in tents for months on end are even slightly leaning towards sending a vote Mitt Romney's way, you haven't been paying attention to this movement. They are all against corporate wealth and greed, and that $240 million Mitt is sitting on is the embodiment of exactly that. Plus… Romney doesn't care about poor people.
 
4. They don't poll poor people
Nobody is coming into the slums and asking Grandma Jenkins and Big Reggie who they are voting for. So don't feed into these polls that say Obama's ratings are down because these poor people never switched sides. There’re way more poor people than rich and middle-class people combined.
 
5. Obama is winning the war on terrorism
Not only did this man bought the troops home from Iraq in time to have Christmas dinner, he murked Osama Bin Laden. Come to think of it… since he bodied Osama and aided in getting Gaddafi ousted from office nobody has even hinted that this man might be a Muslim.
 
All this intense campaigning Ron Paul, Newt, and Romney are out here doing is just to get the default Republican votes that were already going to the GOP nominee. Obama's campaign slogan could be "Let's do it again", he could hold all his public appearances at places serving soul food, and he'd still be a shoe in for reelection.
 
Obama 2012 because you ain't voting for nobody else
Jean DeGrate has spoken