7 Signs That She Might Be Crazy

Nowadays crazy women roam the streets blending in with regular women. Ok hold up… all women are crazy to some degree, but some women are “A Thin Line Between Love and Hate” crazy. You could very well be dating that crazy woman and not have the foggiest idea because she disguises it so well. Here are just a few tips to clear up that fog…

She might be crazy if… she remembers accurate times and dates

Remember when you told her that the last time you called was right after you left the gym at about 7pm last night? Then, she immediately corrected you, almost as if she had a list of dates and times on standby waiting for that exact moment, replying, “No baby; the last time you called me was at 4:32pm.” That’s when you checked your call log, only to realize that she’s dead on. The amount of attention to such a miniscule detail of your life is the first hint of her inner stalker and explicit confirmation that she is crazy as all outdoors.

She might be crazy if… she makes friends with large quantities of your FB friends within days of becoming your FB friend

Since we live in a digital age, almost everybody is on FaceBook. It’s even a common icebreaker for a female to ask, “Are you on FaceBook?” Some of the more “player” type dudes may refrain from sending a friend request to Ms. New Booty, but most other men would welcome her into the fold. Now that she’s on your FaceBook, she’s sending friend requests to every 3rd chick you know, especially the ones that have commented on your wall or status. In 2 days, you went from having 3 mutual friends with her to having 28. This is a early sign of her trying to integrate herself into your life, and before long her and your homies will be meeting up at happy hour. It would be in your best interest to push this chick into the friend zone fast.

She might be crazy if… she compliments herself often

She’s awesome, and she reminds you of it frequently. You’re so lucky to be dating her. Hooray for you, but not really… She’s actually really insecure, and more than trying to convince you of how great she is, she’s trying to convince herself. Somebody did her wrong, she used to be fat and ate her feelings away for years, or some other bullshit led her to the fragile headspace she’s in now. She’s probably past due for some kind of emotional breakdown, and trust me you don’t want to be around, when she starts to fall apart.

 
She might be crazy if… she answers her own questions

“Did I leave my earrings on the nightstand again? No, I left them in the sweatpants I had on last night.” Then she’ll turn to you like she didn’t just have mini conversation with herself, and everything is cool. She is touched, and the longer you stick around the more apparent it will become.

She might be crazy if… she knows things about you that you never told her

Crazy women love to do research. She knows about your DUI from 2001 Spring break and that you worked at Taco Bell for 2 weeks in the summer of 1998 before getting fired for stealing napkins. She won’t hesitate to question you about these newly found facts and will be seriously upset with you for not bringing them up to her on your own accord. Any woman that does unjustifiable probing into your past is a psycho, but you won’t really know until ya’ll break up, and she makes a website detailing all your dirt from yesteryear.

She might be crazy if… you've only known her for week but the important people in her life know who you are

Her mother knows your name and thinks you’re a good guy. Her best friend sent you a friend request on FaceBook and follows you on Twitter. You haven’t even had sex yet, but her inner circle knows all about you… your name, where you work, where you went on your first date, how your lips felt on your first kiss… everything. That’s because in her mind, you’re her boyfriend, and that’s exactly what she’s telling these other folks. As you’re reading this, she’s getting you a spare key to her apartment and clearing out a draw for you in her dresser. Now would be the ideal time to exit.

She might be crazy if… she marks her territory

Oil of Olay body wash is in your soap dish. Her pink towel is hanging on the back of your bathroom door. The tag to the new dress she put on this morning was strategically left on the floor beside the trashcan. She left an unwrapped copy of Beyonce’s 4 sitting in your passenger side car door. Every morning, she says “Good Morning” via your FaceBook wall. Her size 6 red pumps are the first thing you see when you walk into your house. None of this is coincidence. She’s making her presence known in any way she possibly can short of getting a megaphone and standing outside of your house chanting “He’s taken”.  Not only is she letting the world know that she is laying down her claim to you, she’s secretly letting you know that she won’t be leaving without a fight. I see a restraining order in your future.

I know they say crazy bishes have the best pussy, but I’ll settle for mediocre box to avoid being the next victim of a “Snapped” special.
Jean DeGrate has spoken