The 4 guys you should never ever be

Women are annoying and we all know women are annoying. Even women will admit to be annoying. They’re spoiled, they never know what they want to eat, they rub their cold feet against your for warmth, steal food off your plate and that's just the basics. Unfortunately that’s the cost of doing business if you want to be in the company of the fairer sex. Deal with it or die alone. On the flipside men can also be annoying but that bothersome behavior will land a potential gentleman caller in the free meal zone, friendzone or if he’s lucky on the blocklist (but only if she’s that sympathetic). It’s a few guys that lead the league in being irritating as fuck and today I’m going to let some you guys know if you made the list.

1. The “Hi” guy

You’re her friend on social media, have her email or cell phone number and you randomly shoot a “hello” message from time to time followed by meaningless small talk that always leads nowhere. Women hate that shit. They’re literally sitting there glaring at the phone waiting for you to say something of substance or invite her out to do something. But of course since you’re the “Hi” guy you never do. You just continue on with random “hellos” and small talk until she stops responding to you all together.

2. The “passive aggressive” guy

You don’t have a direct bone in your body when it’s comes to the opposite sex. You’ll push her buttons in an attempt to gauge her feelings about you if there are any at all. You’ll conveniently drop things that you’ve seen on her social media accounts into conversation to get a rise out of her. You’re the “No Invite/without me” guy whenever you see her out and about via Instagram. You’re Mr. “Hypothetical 20 Questions” to avoid asking her the questions you really want the answers to.

3. The “How can I help” but no follow thru guy

You love to be seen as the hero but only in the “if I don’t have to go out of my way” type of way. You have endless resources, skills and assets to offer right up until the time you’re being called on for anything. You want to be thought of as the nice guy, the good guy but you’re really an ain’t shit dude hoping to never getting called on shit. But if you do happened to see the Bat symbol waving for you to come to rescue you’ll vanish like a fart in the wind.

4. The “Where’s my hug/When you gonna let me take you out” guy

You’re creepy as fuck dude and have no concept of personal space. You’re a co-worker/neighbor/ friend of a family member. You hand out unsolicited shoulder rubs. You’re a close talker and nothing about your appearance or social status makes any of this acceptable. You’re always 30 seconds away from getting cursed out, 2 minutes away from being smacked and 5 minutes away from somebody’s brother, cousin or boyfriend coming to beating your ass.

Hey my guy, don’t be any of these guys
Jean DeGrate has spoken