Thursday, March 9, 2017

Fuck Boy misappropriation

I’m not a fan of the fuck boy generation and not because I have anything against the way they move but because of the echoing effects of the women dealing with a fuck boy. I occasionally hand out tips on how to spot a fuck boy for the sake of mankind even although I sometimes fit into a few of those fuck boy stereotypes.  It’s just the cost of doing business. But, and you knew a “but” was coming; there’s a lot of guys catching this fuck boy trophy undeservingly. Women will pull that trigger on fuck boy slander faster than a random dude calls a chick a bitch in her DM’s for not responding.

He’s not a fuck boy if he says something you don’t agree with

It’s nothing like a believed to be risqué remark from a guy via social media to receive a swift fuck boy branding. “You’re a fuck boy and you’re probably not getting any pussy that you’re not paying for” I swear it’s already queued up in the predictive text of her smart phone. It could be over anything, like pineapple on pizza.

He’s not a fuck boy if he doesn’t want you

You went on a few dates and some texting back and forth then he just fades away, he’s not fuck a boy; he’s just not fucking with you. Take the L and move on. Don’t defame his character because he’s not checking for you. Would he no longer be titled a fuck boy if he sent you the Obama mic dropping gif along with a detailed message of why you’re not popping? Don’t answer because the answer is “no”.

He’s not a fuck boy if you’re the side chick pretending to your friend like you’re the main

It’s PLENTY of side chicks out here pretending to be in a real relationship for the sake of saving face with the homies. Either the relationship comes to light and the homies find out or he decided to be faithful and cuts you loose. When your pseudo relationship goes up in smoke you immediately falsely label him and double down on your relationship lie. It’s a dirty game.

He’s not a fuck boy if he doesn’t meet your definition of a man

Your daddy worked 3 fulltime jobs to support you, your 5 siblings and your stay at home mom. All heroes don’t wear capes and your dad went above and beyond. Bravo; I tip my hat to him. Your brother can change a flat tire with his bare hands, redone his entire kitchen by himself last Memorial Day weekend and Bob Vila has an autograph photo of him sitting on his fireplace mantle. These guys, these days pale in comparison to the men you grew up with. Now the new dude comes around uses Triple A instead of putting on a donut, has a contractor on speed dial for all his home repairs and believes in splitting the bills so you call him a fuck boy. That’s not how this works it’s 2017 not 1967; they’re not making those guys anymore and if so in very limited quantities.

He’s not a fuck boy if he’s not for your shit

You decided to put him in the free food/friendzone category and decided not to know you anymore. Nah, not a fuck boy. You’re accustomed to guy bowing at your feet and he’s not about that life. Nope, still not a fuck boy. You asked for a favor and he told you “no”. Definitely not a fuck boy and so on and so forth.

Not saying he can’t be a fuck boy for another reason but if any of what’s listed above is the sole reason he’s not a fuck boy

Jean DeGrate has spoken

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