Monday, March 16, 2015

We’re Not Taking the Blame for That

Somehow, some way “us” men catch a lot of heat for the woes of women for which we can’t be held directly accountable. I don’t know when it happened, but one day I was an adult, and I started catching beefs for things I’ve never participated in. “You men this” and “You men that” started being slung around quite frequently. As if there was some sort of Illuminati secret society of men making laws and breaking hearts that I had yet to be invited. I'm 35 now, and I nor anybody I know have been tapped for admission; therefore, I’ve determined we are not to blame.

We set beauty standards
"We" set unrealistic standards of beauty. "We” glorify body types that aren't within reach of the average woman. In spite of it all, "we've" done nothing to neither influence the female image, nor do we have anything to do with the way you feel about yourself. I can't remember not one brainstorming session at our monthly men's meeting where we ever set the standards of female beauty. Nope. Not a single fucking one. We never went over the importance of thigh gaps. Never touched on the need of ridiculously long eyelashes or painted on eyebrows. We never endorsed waist trainers. We didn't start the ass shot and boob job campaign, either. Last time I checked, women with small butts and tiny breasts were still being courted, still getting married, and still having kids. Rihanna has the build of a 12 year old, and guys are still actively checking for her. Aside from that, "us" men have individual preferences (as all people do) and they vary greatly; don’t tight cast us into whatever ideals Beyoncé is pitching you in her latest Vogue spread.

Wasting your time
I’ve dated a lot of women. With that said, I’m prone to walk away when I see that shit isn’t about to pan out. I’m not the “stick around until we can’t stand each other” type. When I call the whole thing off, it doesn’t matter if it’s 2 dates or 30, I always get accused of wasting her time. I'm not the only guy that has been accused of wasting a female companion's precious time. It seems as if any relationship that doesn't end in happily ever after is considered a waste of time. How so? How? Did you have other plans from which your latest suitor held you? Were you painting the town red night after night before he came along? Chances are when a man comes along that starts to hold your attention, it’s likely that you weren’t doing anything of note besides live tweeting Scandal on Thursday nights. This shit doesn’t always end in marriage every time boy meets girl. It’s not a waste of time; it’s the way life goes. Kiss a few frogs until you find your prince because Lord knows every nigga you handed the pussy to wasn't in the running to be your husband.

Past men that hurt you
Carry your baggage until you are ready to put it down. Nobody sets the parameter on how long one should hurt because we all heal at our own pace. That’s right boo boo, you can be butt hurt as long as you need to be. Cool? Ok. I’m glad I got that out of the way. Now if you decide to hop off the bench and get back in the game before your feelings are intact you CAN’T blame that hurt on the new dudes you’re dating. Just because cheating ass Derek said he was running to the store, yet he was really fucking the bitch that lives two buildings down, you can’t spazz out when Jamal makes a liquor store run. Just because Tyrone borrowed half of your tax return to buy a QP of loud then you never saw him again, you can’t tell Jamal you don’t believe in loaning men money when he asked for $20 because he forgot to hit the ATM and the pizza man is outside. How is the pizza man going to get paid? When Pizza Hut stop delivering to your house how you going act? We are all different, but maybe, just maybe you're a bad judge of character.

Nah, you're grown and make decisions on your own.
Jean Degrate speaking for all men has spoken

2 comments:

  1. I'm only here for the Beyonce pic

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ladies, look in the mirror. Love yourself, be honest, drop the bags and do a couple crunches!

    ReplyDelete