5 Signs He Might Be Leech

I dropped the gold digger blog so men would be all the way up on game. You’re welcome by the way, but it’s no secret most of my readers are women so it’s only right I do the same for them. Men aren’t traditionally gold diggers in the same sense that women are. Where a woman can legitimately make a career out of being a “bad bitch” (i.e. Draya); the cards tend not to fall so favorably for men. Most of us men folk will probably never be in the position to have a chick buying us cars, paying our bills and whisking us away on lavish trips just to sit around and look pretty, especially not a regular 9 to 5 working woman. Men have to settle for mooching off of the fairer sex; a pair of Jordan’s here and there, daytime usage of the car and couple of bucks from her tax return to put towards the re-up. Well anyway on with the signs...

1. He bums from strangers

Independent men have this level of pride that almost forbids them from asking a stranger for anything outside of the time and directions. Going any further than that the situation has to be dire. Independent men will ride around a 6 block radius for 45 minutes looking for an address before pulling over to ask for directions. Now a leech on the other hand has no problem asking anybody for just about anything. “You got a cigarette?”  “You got 35 cents?” “Can I use your cellphone?” These are tell-tell signs that will automatically let you know he’s comfortable in his dependency on other and will have no problem fully exploiting you and your resources.

2. He blames others for his position in life

He’s stuck in a dead end job because of a charge he caught for some shit he didn’t do in 2001. He can’t get his debt down because his baby’s mother is a vindictive bitch who's out to get all his money since he decided he doesn’t want to be with her anymore. He can’t get a promotion because he was late twice 6 months ago and his boss won’t let that shit slide. He can’t do this and he’s stuck with that for any reason other than his own. The world is against him and if you give him a chance he’ll make you his crutch to get out of the whole he dug himself or pull you into it. This is the type of guy that will get you to co-sign on a car then conveniently forget to pay the note after 7 months.

3. He’s a petty criminal

He sells a little bit of weed and by a little bit I mean "maybe 3 dimes on a Friday night” little bit of weed to support his own habit. He’ll shoplift while shopping in an “I forgot that case of water was under the grocery cart” kind of way or I’m not going to pay for this 3 pack of T-shirts from Target because I only need one. He steals plastic silverware from Chipotle and straws from Chic-Fil-A. That level of pettiness is a red flag saying “I’m comfortable with taking advantage of situations where I see fit and I’ll always find a way to justify my behavior". When he uses up all your laundry detergent his excuse will be he washed some of your clothes too. When he brings your car back on empty it will be because he was running your errands when he was out.

4. He mainly dates fat women but he’s not fat

Before you roll into that some guys like fat women speech, I know some guys prefer larger women but that’s a small percentage of guys. I also mean fat camp spanx can’t hide this fat, run 40 feet and have a heart attack fat; not that I could stand to lose 15 to 30lbs fat. Fat women that fit into those aforementioned categories tend to take care of men. She’ll buy you a cell phone and add you to her plan.  She’ll not only stand in line for the new Jordan’s she’ll buy you and your son a pair. Fat women aim to please and a leech will forego having sex with the lights on for a woman that will hold him down with her wallet.

5. He does poor people shit

His cable is in his mother’s name because he owes Comcast $50 bucks from 2008. He takes change from the “take a penny leave a penny” tray at 7-11 even when he already has the change.  He splits cigarettes with people. “Let me hit that short.” He’ll put regular gas (87 octane) in the car when the owner’s manual clearly calls for premium.  “The car don’t ride no different on 93.” He’ll push the limits on how far he can ride with the gas light on. “The gas light just came on I can make it there and back.” He mixes the hand soap in his bathroom with water.  Instead of paying his parking tickets he’ll go above and beyond to find off the street parking to avoid a boot. “I know a spot we can park it’s like 7 blocks down the street but we can use the exercise anyway.”

Honorable mention:  He’s a dead beat daddy

It’s really simple math here if a man won’t take care of his seed he’ll most definitely not take care of you. He’s already taking food off the table for his kids and clothes off their back to look fly, buy drinks at the bar and date you. When he has your heart the cycle of taking will continue with you.

 
Be on the lookout ladies he’ll eat all your babies’ fruit snacks and run up your cable bill with on-demand charges
Jean DeGrate has spoken