I'm a firm believer that we date wrong. We tend to get wrapped up in people before we really know what's good for us in the long run. The starting point is asking questions that matter off top. We got to skip all that "what's your sign/what do you like to do for fun" bullshit and get to the real shit. You get the idea, right? Cool, let's just get into it. This isn't any type of order and the importance is based on your personal preference.
Do you like Tyler Perry movies?
It's two types of people in this world... People that like Tyler Perry movies and people that actually like movies. In order to exist in the same space for a long duration of time you need to know what side of the line your potential mate lands on. If you're an Oscar nod film buff chances are the Madea lover next to you won't be here for your Netflix musings.
Are you religious/spiritual?
Even though must people that claim to be religious really aren't, but either way they'll drop the God card on you in arguments to suit their narrative whether it be personal, political or socially. If you're also religious all these shenanigans will fall right into your wheelhouse. Spiritual is that religious sweet spot where people pretty much do whatever the fuck they want to do because they don't exactly subscribe to any organized religion directly but believe in a higher power typically named "The Universe". Spiritual people tend to be a bit easier going but way more subjectable to lifestyle fads like the paleo diet, homemade jewelry and men with hoop earrings. If you're spiritual this will pan out perfectly for you. If you're atheist/agnostic this will also be a great fit because spiritual people typically don't attempt to sell you on their beliefs.
Do you believe in gender roles?
Even though chivalry and gender roles are dying out some people still want a love like their grandma and grandpa had. There isn't anything wrong with that unless of course you're not about that shit. If you want a partner that you consider your equal and expect them to pull their own weight then the old school way probably isn't going to work for. This is definitely a discussion worth having sooner than later.
Are you a social media person or a person on social media?
No they are not the same people. They are very different. Some people are just online passing time, connecting with friends, still playing Farmville on Facebook, posting pictures of their kids and stealing memes and shit. Now other people are social media people where they divulge all types of personal info on a regular basis. They share their highs and lows. They live for likes and followers. They post pictures from every event. They have made several online only friends and have several online only beefs that never go farther than the screen of their smart phones. If you're not a social media person dating a social media person can be annoying as fuck.
Are you poor?
If you're broke please just scroll down to the next question.
Seriously, get your broke ass on; this isn't for you.
Poverty constantly gets in the way of shit. You can't do it big on 40k a year. It's going to be a lot of Netflix and chilling. It's going to be a lot of nights with the fire stick. Outside of having funds for entertainment (which is a hurdle within itself), but building beyond just casual dating becomes a new task. Co-habituating with a broke person kind of makes you a parent. Are you ready to take on that type of responsibility?
Are you in a relationship?
Cheating is popular as hell right now. Real live everybody is doing it; poor people, rich people, famous people, people with everything to lose and everybody else in between. It's a fair question. Nobody wants to be in a viral fight video because your bae already had a bae and that bae caught you slipping because you didn't know they existed.
Does somebody think they are in a relationship with you?
If the answer to question above this is "no" this is a very important follow up question; especially for these "I don't believe in titles" people. So they maybe single but somebody is running around with them as the screensaver on their cell phone and heart eye emojis next to their name stored in the contacts. Which can also end in a World Star Hip Hop moment or somebody sliding into your DM's to let you know what's really going on.
You might want to ask these in the first 10 minutes and save yourself some time
Jean DeGrate has spoken
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